A recent study published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology has shed light on an often-overlooked aspect of romantic relationships: the importance of shared reality between partners. The research reveals that when couples share a mutual understanding of their experiences, not only does it strengthen their bond, but it also helps individuals make sense of the world, providing them with clarity and purpose. This shared understanding is essential for reducing uncertainty and enhancing a person’s sense of meaning in life.
The concept of shared reality refers to the process through which romantic partners co-create a mutual understanding of their experiences and the world around them. While previous research has explored how individuals find meaning in their personal achievements and goals, the role that interpersonal connections, specifically romantic relationships, play in this process has been less examined. The new study digs into this understudied area, exploring how shared reality with a partner helps individuals manage uncertainty and gain a greater sense of life’s purpose.
The Study’s Background: A Personal Journey to Understanding Shared Reality
The inspiration for the study came from the personal experiences of the lead researcher, M. Catalina Enestrom, a postdoctoral researcher at IESE Business School. Enestrom reflected on her own experience leaving for university, when the new experiences and perspectives she gained created a growing gap between her and her friends back home. As she navigated this transition, she realized that her friends could no longer help her understand her new life as they once had. This personal realization sparked Enestrom’s curiosity about how shared experiences in relationships help individuals navigate uncertainty and gain meaning in their lives.
“I’ve always believed that one of the core purposes of our relationships is to help us make sense of the world,” Enestrom explained. Her academic journey eventually led her to investigate shared reality and its implications for romantic relationships, leading to the current study.
The Study’s Methodology and Findings
To examine the relationship between shared reality, uncertainty, and meaning in life, Enestrom and her colleagues conducted five studies, using various methodologies, including cross-sectional surveys, longitudinal data collection, and experimental manipulations.
Study 1: Shared Reality and Meaning in Romantic Relationships
The first study explored the link between shared reality and meaning in life within romantic couples. The research team recruited 103 couples to participate in a laboratory-based experiment. Each couple engaged in a conversation where one partner shared their fears, and the other responded naturally. The researchers then measured the levels of shared reality and meaning in life by analyzing self-reports and coding observable behaviors such as expressing agreement or completing each other’s sentences.
The results showed that couples who perceived a stronger shared reality with their partner reported a higher sense of meaning in life. This effect remained even after controlling for relationship satisfaction, suggesting that shared reality contributes to life meaning beyond just having a positive relationship. Additionally, behaviors that indicated a strong shared reality, such as completing sentences, predicted both self-reported shared reality and a greater sense of meaning in life.
Study 2: Shared Reality in the Context of Racism and the Sociopolitical Climate
Study 2 focused on the experiences of Black Americans following the murder of George Floyd in 2020. The researchers recruited 190 participants in romantic relationships, including both intraracial and interracial couples, to explore how shared reality with their partner regarding racism and the sociopolitical climate influenced uncertainty and meaning in life.
The findings revealed that greater shared reality between partners was linked to reduced uncertainty about racism and the broader sociopolitical environment. This reduction in uncertainty, in turn, led to a stronger sense of meaning in life. The researchers were particularly surprised to find that shared reality was not significantly different between intraracial and interracial couples, suggesting that even when partners come from different backgrounds, they can co-create a shared understanding of their experiences.
“My earlier interests were focused on how partners’ different life experiences might inhibit shared reality,” Enestrom explained. “To my surprise and delight, there were no differences in shared reality between intraracial and interracial couples.”
Study 3: The Role of Shared Reality in Work-Related Meaning
Study 3 examined how shared reality with a romantic partner influenced meaning in the work domain, particularly during times of uncertainty. The researchers recruited 155 frontline healthcare workers during the early stages of the COVID-19 pandemic, a time marked by significant stress and uncertainty. Participants completed surveys assessing their shared reality with their partner, their uncertainty about the work environment, and their sense of work-related meaning at two time points, six months apart.
The results showed that couples who shared a stronger reality at the onset of the pandemic reported less uncertainty about their work environment over time. This decrease in uncertainty was linked to a greater sense of meaning in their work. These findings highlight that, even in highly stressful and uncertain conditions, shared reality with a partner can provide individuals with a sense of clarity and purpose.
Study 4: Causal Evidence for Shared Reality’s Impact on Uncertainty and Meaning
In the fourth study, the researchers used an experimental design to provide causal evidence for the relationship between shared reality, uncertainty, and meaning in life. Participants in romantic relationships were randomly assigned to recall either a high shared reality experience (e.g., feeling “on the same page” with their partner) or a low shared reality experience (e.g., feeling disconnected from their partner’s perspective).
The results demonstrated that recalling a high shared reality experience reduced uncertainty about the experience, which in turn increased the participants’ sense of meaning in life. These effects were not explained by mood or relationship satisfaction, further supporting the conclusion that shared reality plays a key role in reducing uncertainty and increasing meaning.
Study 5: Shared Reality as a Couple-Level Construct
The final study explored shared reality at the couple level. Participants read a vignette about a hypothetical couple discussing a book. In one condition, the couple exhibited high shared reality behaviors (such as completing each other’s sentences and agreeing about the book), while in another condition, the couple demonstrated low shared reality (e.g., disagreeing about the book’s interpretation).
The results mirrored those of Study 4: participants who read about the high shared reality couple perceived them as experiencing less uncertainty and greater meaning during the discussion. This study emphasized that shared reality reduces uncertainty and fosters meaning, regardless of the specific context.
Implications of the Study
The findings from these studies underscore the importance of shared reality in romantic relationships as a key factor in helping individuals reduce uncertainty and find meaning in life. This research not only expands our understanding of the epistemic function of romantic relationships but also suggests that building and nurturing these connections is vital for managing the complexities of life. Romantic relationships, it seems, provide much more than emotional support—they play a critical role in helping individuals navigate life’s uncertainties and make sense of the world around them.
“Close relationships, especially with romantic partners, help us make sense of the world and provide a sense of purpose,” Enestrom remarked. “Building and nurturing these connections is key to navigating uncertainty and creating meaning in our lives.”
Future Research Directions
While the study provides valuable insights, there are several areas that warrant further exploration. For instance, future research could explore whether there are situations in which a lack of shared reality might be beneficial, such as in workplace settings where diverse perspectives might encourage creativity. Additionally, the researchers are interested in examining how shared reality functions in different types of relationships (e.g., romantic, familial, professional) and across various cultural contexts.
Enestrom’s long-term goal is to deepen our understanding of how shared reality helps people reduce uncertainty and find meaning across a wide range of relationships. By examining factors like epistemic trust and how shared reality varies across different contexts, future studies could inform interventions to foster shared reality where it is most beneficial.
“My ultimate goal is to explore how shared reality works in different relationship types and contexts,” Enestrom said. “By understanding its function and how it varies across cultures and relationships, we can develop interventions to help people create meaningful connections.”
Conclusion
This groundbreaking research highlights the powerful role that shared reality plays in helping individuals reduce uncertainty and gain meaning in life, particularly within romantic relationships. By co-creating a shared understanding of their experiences, romantic partners provide each other with clarity and purpose, helping to navigate life’s complexities. As we continue to explore the intersection of relationships, uncertainty, and meaning, it is clear that romantic relationships are not only vital for emotional connection but also for helping us make sense of the world around us.